I was sitting in the bus today, on the way home from the hospital where I was getting my Aredia treatment and watching the traffic. Once again, thoughts consumed me, and I wondered exactly what I would do in such a situation.

What would I do if I had to see her in the car next to us, stopped at a traffic light? Would I ignore her and pretend not to have seen? Would I glare at her in anger? I don’t think I could greet her in a friendly manner. What would I do if I bumped into her at the shops? I could not shun her kids. They are not to blame for the whole mess and I think they are beautiful little angels.

But I could not speak to her.

She told me that any woman’s husband could lie naked on her couch and she would not touch them. Yet she took mine. I slept on that couch while he shared her bed. They broke up three months later, but the damage was done. Betrayal complete.

I will not sue her for breakdown of the marriage, but I don’t think I can forgive her either.

Maybe one day.

But not now.